Are you the one that ducks when you see someone pull out their camera? Do you ‘hide’ behind Auntie Ruth or grab the nearest baby or small child to block your body or partially cover your face? Trust me, you are not fooling anyone; you are experiencing a lack of confidence and joy along with low self-love.
A few decades ago, I vividly remember a conversation with my mother, Maureen. Mom was an avid “Law & Order” fan. She watched every episode multiple times. I noticed the life view she developed from watching the show of all the bad, evil people out there. Whenever I shared that I was going downtown or taking a road trip out of town, she was so worried something would happen, always warning me to be careful because there is so much crime.
You see, the constant exposure to a crime show had tainted her beliefs that all of this was happening constantly even though no one in our family had experienced anything like what happened on that show.
On that visit, I suggested mom watch Oprah instead because the current show was focused on positive, self-love topics. I asked Mom, “Do you love yourself, Mom?” She replied, “Oh that is ridiculous Traci, why would I even think about that.” I shared with her the impact on me of a book I had been reading daily, You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay. I shared with Mom the mirror exercise from the book, how it was suggested to look directly in the mirror into your eyes and tell yourself ‘I love you’ without looking away. Of course, most people experience tears when doing this, but the author encourages us to keep doing it daily until we no longer cry or look away. This was a very empowering exercise for me when I lost my mojo in my early thirties.
Mom never did what the book suggested; instead she continued to feed herself a negative diet of life from TV. I, on the other hand, did the exercise and still, twenty-some years later, repeat many of the affirmations from this book. Whatever helps us move the needle to self-love is worth it — your life depends on it. Baby steps are better than nothing. You are worth it.
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